After a beautiful day in Conbarro in Spain (Galicia) I opened my e-mails to read my Tutors report on part 1, ideas & processses. In retrospect, I probably shouldn’t have opened the e-mail at that point as I was very tired. As I started reading, I found myself getting upset as all I was concentrating on was on one comment that my tutor made; That I had misunderstood an exercise (1.2 a personal experience) – Every  word after that was not entering my tired brain and therefore nothing was being taken in correctly. Part of this journey in my learning is being able to take constructive criticism positively;  for me to excel and find new ways of thinking and therefore produce new, interesting work.

I have to admit I have had to read my tutors report about ten times to completely take in her expert and valuable advice and to not take her comments personally.

The feedback starts with Rebecca stating that there is evidence that I haven’t completely engaged with this assignment and therefore have been unable to fully investigate my creative abilities. I have to say it is probably true and the reasons are many; I found part one harder than I thought, not only because I was going through personal problems that were clogging my brain but also because it was challenging for me. Ideas and processes has a lot to do with critical thinking and writing down your ideas and thought processes. This area is a very important part of my academic development and as a person that has always chosen art over academia this challenge straight away froze my ability to advance. I know I can do it and I understand the importance of doing so; I just have to let go and experiment more, rather than always try and embellish my work.

This assignment was designed to get me thinking and to challenge the way I develop my ideas and it has certainly done that! To the point it has almost pulled the rug from under my feet! I am starting to think differently and I am viewing art in a new way, it is making me question the way I work and Rebecca (my tutor) hits the nail on the head when she suggests that in order for me to get the most from my studying I have to challenge my design/creative aesthetic that I have been developing over a life time. I need to loosen my style (hard one). I need to let go of the way I present my work, as at this point the assesors are looking at my creative abilities in the task set. I need to present raw, undeveloped drawings and textiles samples rather than manicured and finished samples as at this point they are ideas not finished samples.

I think in exercise 1.2 personal experience it is not that I misunderstood the brief but more that I was trying to do too much and got ‘lost in translation’. I got caught up in the emotion and sentiment and lost my way. I suppose the fact that I was talking about someone’s personal belongings – someone who had passed away- made the task harder as I was aware of not offending and in doing so I lost my train of thought. The vintage book was meant to be my sketchbook but stopped  being a place where I logged my findings and became something lest informative. I need to stick to the brief and not waver or maybe keep it simple?
What has suprised me is that Rebecca found my Research interesting and revelant to the course -I thought that research was my weaker point. Rebecca’s  comments  has boosted my confidence to carry on gathering contemporary and innovative practicioners and evaluate and analyse their work. It is something I have only just started to enjoy which has already helped broaden my mind and in turn, hopefully feed my creativity.

Rebecca has suggested some reading and various tutorials in drawing etc, which can help me go back to basics and remind me of mark making that I have done so many times before but forgot about. At this stage I need to be more experimental!